8th January, Gurgaon.
As I moved from a fresher to a neophyte stage I realised that as I progress the distance between me and Krishna keeps on decreasing as well as increasing.
In one way we start experiencing the presence of Krishna and Guru near us, we just need to `tune’ ourselves by our daily sadhna bhakti and a sincere desire to get some instructions and voila ! they usually come fast. We then take another baby step towards a firm faith in Krishna, Guru and Shastra. What is invariably missing is a sincere and burning desire inside me to receive instructions than the response.
On the flip-side I also realise how almost unlimited jivas are serving Krishna in the eternal world and that just being a servant of the servant of the servant also is a very far distance from Him. We also realise what could be the position of a single fallen infinitesimal soul, if anything at all, in relation to our previous acharays and devotees in serving Him. At first it is painful to see the increased or rather infinite distance as we realise that there is no chance to go near Him. But after sometime a strange phenomenon occurs in our heart and we suddenly become blissful and relish every moment in just being an instrument to serve Krishna indirectly. Not even serving Him but just thinking and praying that one day we may become an indirect servant makes our heart and soul glow, that thought gives us more pleasure than serving Him directly. In fact we forget that we ever wished to serve Him directly !
Krishna is not straight and nor are His ways very straight !
I also realised that this change happened when I prayed to Srila Prabhupada, tried to serve him sincerely and developed a relationship with him first. As this relationship developed I immediately realised my good fortune. I realised how fortunate I am to have come under the shelter of Srila Prabhupada’s lotus feet and ISKCON. And how by being under the shelter of Srila Prabhupada opens a direct door of service to Krishna via MahaPrabhu and Guru parampara. The sooner I become aware of my good fortune, and act accordingly, the faster I progress in my devotional journey.
All glories to Srila Prabhupada.
All glories to Sri Guru and Gauranga.