Simple heart Vs self pity

I learnt an important lesson on June 10th this year.

I was getting myself deeper into a self pity mode.  That’s when I read one transcription of HH Romapad swami maharaj. He instructed that `we should not let ourselves fall into self pity mode and it is best to keep our heart simple and and always be greatful to the Lord for what he has given us.’

These words stuck me like thunder and I realise that I have to snap out of this self pity mode and I did it. Thank you so much Maharaj for this wonderful instruction.

Over the time I realised that as we become more greatful to Krishna our hearts turns softer and softer. I also realise that as our dependence on Krishna increases, He guides us.

To those who are constantly devoted to serving Me with love, I give the understanding by which they can come to Me. (Bg 10.10)

Thank you Srila Prabhupada for constantly showing right directions to a neophyte like me, I know you are there with us, guiding each of your follower and well wisher.

Srila Prabhupada’s purports give us complete knowledge


Since last one week or so I was trying to read NOI as I realised that even after reading it in the past I don’t know much about it, beyond the surface level reading. I downloaded various lectures by senior devotees and downloaded few notes posted on iskcondesiretree and was unsuccessfully trying to learn the `deeper’ meaning of each verse.

Today morning as I sat again to learn the first and second verse I opened pocketveda on my ipad and as I started reading the verse first and then instead of going back to my downloaded notes I felt like again reading Srila Prabhupada’s purport, after reading 3 paras of second verse’s purport the meaning came in a flash to me, I was shocked the way I was able to absorb it.

I realised that atleast for me reading Srila Prabhupada’s books are best way forward. My hankering for reading previous acaraya’s books came down drastically today morning as I realise that Srila Prabhupa has given us jist of all vedic literature. If I understand them well then may be in future I can understand other books better.

I was hopping like a monkey from one book to another and from one lecture to another. I let my own mind and intelligence take the decision over faith in instructions of my diksha and siksha gurus to read only Srila Prabhupada’s books and do not read too many books. I beg forgiveness at their lotus feet and promise to first read all of Srila Prabhupada’s books diligently and beg all vaisanava to help me develop faith in Guru, Shastra and Sadhu.  Today I again realised that using my own intelligence I can’t reach anywhere.

All Glories to Srila Prabhupada.

  • Posted by Giriraj Das on August 10,2013 at 7:30am

Lasting impressions

Hare Krishna


I was talking with a close devotee friend, Sumeet Gupta Prabhuji, yesterday evening. While talking to him I realised how so many senior devotees have left their mark on me. I am sharing some of them to show my deep appreciation for them. And there are hundreds of others senior devotees in ISKCON from whom we get inspiration every day.

The first one to leave his imprint, continues to do it, HG Rukmini Krishna Das Prabhuji, he is the temple president of Sri Sri Radha Radhika Raman and Krishna Balram temple, Punjabi Bagh, New Delhi. Let me admit that whatever little sadhna bhakti I have in me is all thanks to him. His lectures shaped me each time I listened to him and I was fortunate to be able to get his direct instructions which saved me many a times whenever I felt constrained or disturbed. The only good thing I have done in my spiritual life is to go to him and share whatever I felt inside me openly. Looking back, I can laugh at myself and my silly questions or agitations on small issues. He always heard me patiently and gave instructions which saved me from going astray. He takes class every Saturday and each lecture is a gem to be absorbed in heart and follow. The centre is one of the best in India and dedication to Srila Prabhupada and ISKCON runs supreme.

Second is a short description. During my initial years I one day saw lots of hustle and bustle in Punjabi Bagh temple and I found someone special is visiting. I couldn’t get the name initially and listened to his lecture, it was mesmerising. I later told my wife, rather foolishly, that after listening to his lecture I felt like leaving everything and walking behind him. My wife suffered a lot of insecurity due to this foolish statement to her and she many a time would tell me that she dreams that one of the western devotees has taken her husband away with them J . Even today I remember the power and conviction his lecture had and I am sure that if he would stood up and asked who would like to dedicate his life to Krishna, I would have raised my hand. I can only imagine what effect Srila Prabhupada had on these young disciples. That person is HH Giriraj Swami Maharaj. I am most fortunate to be called his servant in my spiritual name.

Third one is very special, he gave me diksha this year in Feb, HH Bhakti Charu Swami Maharaj. I met him two and a half years ago in Gurgaon, another good story for some other time as to how Krishna makes us meet our Guru. I paid my obeisances and my life was never the same again. I had know idea who he was, I just knew that he took my heart away with him. I could not keep him out of my thoughts and within days I pleaded with him to take me under his shelter and he took pity on me and accepted me as his son and disciple. He inspires me everyday and shapes me. Most of all he cemented my relationship with ISKCON as an organisation, my strong love and attachment for ISKCON and Srila Prabhupada today is all his mercy.

And the last on today’s list is HH Radha Govinda swami maharaj. What a speaker, what style of katha and so much rasa in every sentence, in every word. HG Karuna Chandra Das recommended listening to his lectures. He made me lose interest in philosophy and learn to absorb Krishna katha, from Bhishma stuti, Giriraj Dharan lila, Bali Maharaj, Prahalad Stuti….., each katha is dipped in love for Krishna. I hope to take his darshan very soon in Vrindavan Dham.

Today morning, at a Bhakti Vriksha seminar, I was told that we can only give what we have. If we have a grief then we can give grief , if we have anxiety then we can pass on anxiety and only if we have Krishna then we can offer Krishna consciousness to others. All these senior Vaisanavas gave me Krishna Consciousness, it is entirely my lack of receptiveness that I am still a neophyte. I should rather say that despite all my shortcomings and material propensities I still tasted Krishna’s nectar due to their pure consciousness.

I will write about my realisations from other senior Vaisanavas soon.

All Glories to Sri Sri Guru and Gauranga.

All Glories to Srila Prabhupada

  • Posted by Giriraj Das on August 8,2013 at 5:26pm

Does Krishna loves gopis more than mother Yashoda ?

Hare Krishna
August 8,2013 at 4:35pm


HH Bhakti Charu Swami is going to take to take a seminar on Udhav Gita in December at Ujjain and I thought let me read the book first as I was keen to attend it.

I went through all my e books and got Udhav Sandesh and started reading it. Foolishly I thought they were same books. It was after a while when I realised my mistake but I continued it as it is a short book and it held my attention. Udhava Sandesh entails Krishna asking Udhava to go to Vrindavan and inform all the Vrajawasis that Krishna is going to come back to Vrindavan and tell them how He miss them all. He describes in detail how to reach Vrindavan from Mathura and various milestones on the way. He describes gopi’s love for Him. He remembered His earlier pastimes with many of them and glorify them.

When we read such literature the first thing which strengthens in our heart is that Krishna is a person with feelings.

I had two questions in my heart. I am sharing the first one today

Why there is so less description of suffering of mother Yashoda compared to that of gopis in the book ? Was the gopi’s love for Krishna more than mother Yashoda’s ?

I just had a vague answer in my heart but knowing my position as a neophyte, I asked a senior Prabhuji at temple today morning. He listened patiently and replied that it is difficult to understand the feelings of each acarya and Rupa Goswami, who authored this book, is in madhurya rasa so he has apparently glorified gopi bhav more. He told me that another book on the same topic by another acaraya mentions that Udhava is told to follow a stream of water and when he would reach the source of the stream he will reach Nand Maharaj’s home. The stream is made from Nanda Maharaja and mother Yashoda’s tears !! He nonetheless added that in Vatsalaya rasa there is only that much one can love someone whereas in madhurya rasa one can cross all the boundaries and we know that  madhurya rasa also has vataslaya rasa inside it.

While listening to Prabhuji’s reply my own hazy answer got suddenly cleared and I told him, `Prabhuji can we also understand that Krishna, as supreme personality of Godhead, has no specific mother or lover he is reciprocating in equivalent degree to whosoever is offering him his/her love. Prabhuji’s eyes lit up and he said yes you can think it like that as well.

His reply and confirmation cleared a lot of doubts inside me and gave a new clarity and my own little realisation. Hare Krishna !


  • Posted by Giriraj Das on August 8,2013 at 4:35pm

Incense stick

 Incense stick

I was doing my evening kirtan/puja the other day and I saw the burning incense stick.

And in a flash I saw myself in it.

The incense stand is ISKCON, rising up and shining bright in a dull world.

The incense stick is my Guru Maharaj, holding me, without him I am nothing.

The incense on the stick is myself. brown in color, neither good nor bad, a nobody, was living an animal’s life.

Ash signifies that under the protection of Guru and with the association of devotees I am turning white, satvik.

The small black ring ring signify my visible anarthas.

The little red burning ring is the knowledge I am gaining.

And the black burnt part hanging from within the incense stick is my heart, still full of invisible anarthas.

Only by serving servant’s of servant of Sri Guru and Gauranga I hope to overcome every obstacle and develop unalloyed love for Krishna.

All Glories to Sri Sri Guru and Gauranga.

All Glories to Srila Prabhupada

  • Posted by Giriraj Das on July 18,2013 at 9:30pm

My Prayer to Narsimha Dev

O ! Narasimha Deva, please rip open my chest with your sharp nails, as you opened Hiranayakashipu’s

Please take out all the vices filled deep inside me.. Lust, anger, greed, illusion, envy and bewilderment.

Hidden deep inside me infinite desires still long for sense gratification, respect and praise from others.

O ! Narasimha Deva, please rip open my body of which I am so proud of and take out all these vices entangling like long intestines within me.

O ! Narasimha Deva, please fill my mind, body and soul with unalloyed devotion for Sri Sri Radha Shyamsundar and bless me that I am able to serve Srila Prabhupad’s servant’s servant’s servant’s servants.

All Glories to Sri Sri Guru and Gauranga.

All Glories to Srila Prabhupada

  • Posted by Giriraj Das on July 18,2013 at 9:03am

My little realisations in krishna consciousness

some of my realisations as I sold a property to buy a home.

1.  As the deal went up and down, I realised my prayers have improved !! I would chant but was not praying too much but now the prayers started !  I prayed constantly to let me go thru all the anxiety but please take over the home I was buying this home to establish it as Krishna’s new abode.

2.  I realised, and could appreciate, a little bit, why Kunti Maharani was asking for more and more trouble.

3.  I need to have complete faith in Krishna. Unless there is complete faith the anxiety won’t go.

4.  I should learn not to hate people who fail us at the time of testing. It is easier to read and speak about it but when it fell on my head, I got the first hand taste. Very good learning experience. why hate the messenger when my own Karmas are coming back to haunt me. But Krishna does makes it easier for even a neophyte devotee to go through such situations with ease. I thank Him to make me realise it and practice it a bit.

5.  I must do my best and leave the rest to Krishna, He knows what is best for me and is my best well wisher.  So I must thank him for any final result.

I, therefore, thank Him for all this upheaval during this property  deal and making me stronger in my sadhna Bhakti and I also got few realisations as a bonus.

All Glories to Sri Sri Guru and Gauranga.

All Glories to Srila Prabhupada

  • Posted by Giriraj Das on June 28,2013 at 9:00pm

A wonderful garden

The best thing we can all ask for and aspire for in our devotional service is to wish for Sadhu Sangha. All our Anarthas can be be gone with Sadhu Sangha and we can hope to get Krishna Prema one day.

Prabhupada made such a wonderful arrangement.

He created a garden full of blossoming flowers

And ensured that new flowers will continue to blossom even after he has left this planet.

This unique garden has gardeners, teachers, administrators…

This is a unique and the best garden in the whole world.

These flowers will continue to spread the sweetest smell of Krishna consciousness for next 10,000 years.

This beautiful garden has everything a soul can aspire for and then more.

And Prabhupada named this wonderful garden….ISKCON

  • Posted by Giriraj Das on June 8,2013 at 6:00am

A wolf in sheep’s clothing

Looking good from outside, inside I’m full of lust.

I am worse than a prostitute, I seek bodily pleasure every moment.

My mind gets agitated at the smallest of pretext.

The desire for fame has married sense gratification within me.

And its children have burned  down the small shoots of devotion within my heart, Leaving it hard and black.

I therefore beg Guru and all the Vaisanavas to feel pity on me, please bless me to have continuous association of Sadhus and shastras.

There won’t be a more fallen soul than me to deserve their mercy and to prove that they are all Patita Pavan.

  • Posted by Giriraj Das on May 25, 2013 at 8.52am

My Guru Maharaj

My Guru is the very life of me.

He is Caitanaya MaharaPrabhu for me, though I am completely unqualified, he took me under his shelter

and told me my relationship with Krishna.

He is Sanatana Goswami for me, who has convinced me about this relationship.

He is Rupa Goswami for me, who is teaching me how to do my prescribed duties.

He is Raghunath Das Goswami for me, who is teaching me what is the goal of my life.

By his mercy alone I can dream of having, one day, the pure love of Krishna within my heart.

He is the one who can get me the `adhikar’ to serve Holy Dhama.

He is only one who will make me see Radha and Krishna in MahaPrabhu.

He will one day bring out my real spiritual self and give me the right to serve Krishna’s associates.

He will cut the knots of my false love and attachment with this material world.

I can just beg my Guru, and all the Vaishanavas, to bless me in my devotional service to develop Bhava.

  • Posted by Giriraj Das on May 19, 2013 at 9:15pm